Write about hate, she says. It's a strong emotion - one of the strongest, surely - so it must be there somewhere, in my story, in yours.
Strange how hard it is to find it when you're looking for it. I read through my things, and think, no, that's not really hate, that's just him being tired, offended, hurt, that's just her trying to deflect attention or similar such drivel. Nothing that could qualify as pure hate.
Then I realised the problem - I was justifying the moments of hate my characters go through. He's being nasty? Well, that's just because XYZ. He doesn't really hate her.
See the difference?
So here's a scene where I believe my one MC actually feels hatred, though of course he does so for many, many reasons.
Tay wanted so much to curl up, to vanish into the wall, even, but he could go nowhere. His limbs where held in place by heavy iron shackles that bit into his wrists and ankles. It had been hours - days - since he'd had any feeling in them.
Time blurred right along with Tay's vision as beatings, hunger and darkness took their toll on the young prince, but one thought kept him there, kept his mind from slipping away completely.
He would not give in, would not allow the Dark King this final victory. His body might fail him, bits and pieces of him might surrender themselves as he lost the strenght to hold strong, but his mind would remain his own.
He would find the moment, the opportunity, to get his revenge, and if he had to return from the dead to do so then that's what he'd do. Twice he'd tried to kill the king when he came to check on his prisoner, twice he'd failed. Once, because a spasm in his arm made him drop the make-shift knife. The second time, he'd managed to actually touch Feardorcha's neck before the torturers pulled him back.
The Dark King had laughed at him, then, but Tay would get the better of him, if it was the last thing he did.
What do you think? Am I right, is this hate?
To those of you who've read my other posts on Tay and Doyle, this here is very early on in the story, shortly after Tay was captured.
Right, now I'm going to go see what the others HERE think of hate...
Poor Tay. His resolve to hang in there even if he had to come back from the dead to kill the King is powerful.
ReplyDeleteAwww poor Tay indeed. But then I already know it gets A LOT more complicated than that... *snigger*
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ps. don't forget to check in on next friday to see who won what!
I liked it, powerful hate, though as you say, it's justified, and we do tend to justify the darker emotions in characters that we relate to as if that makes them go away. My favorite part was probably Tay remembering his two failed attempts at murder.
ReplyDeleteIf you get a chance, check out a fellow writer's zombie story and help me make him wear an embarrassing shirt next year! It's the ultimate grudge match between social media and the zombies. Details are here:
http://kelworthfiles.wordpress.com/2011/07/19/prove-the-zombies-wrong-social-platforms-can-build-readership/
The sworn intention of revenge is pretty common, almost cliche. (Visit a middle school.) The two attempts of enacting his revenge, however, transform this from something standard into something cool. I really like how you solidify his failing body through the first failed attempt, and I was rooting for him on his second.
ReplyDeleteCertainly intense feelings. I get a bigger sense of determination and self-preservation from most of this passage. The bits for me that brings out hate are the attempts to exact revenge. It's one thing to think about it, another thing to make a credible effort to enact it.
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